Did you know it’s possible to ferment hops and barley into a beverage called “beer?” Well, I certainly didn’t. And I don’t think this so-called “beer” will catch on with mountain bikers. If we do enjoy a taste of alcohol after a ride, we drink a nice riesling, or chilled champagne if there is any. I say: pinkies out!
The Oskar Blues Brewery of Brevard, North Carolina, however, begs to differ. They are so sure that mountain bikers will enjoy their beer that they’re joining forces with a mountain bike guiding and resort service called The Bike Farm to create a mountain bike resort that might just knock the champagne flute right out of your hand.
Just look at this artfully vignetted photo and tell me you don’t want to ride where it was taken. But be warned. I will know you for a wastrel and a liar if you say as much.
According to Brevard, NC newspaper, the Transylvania Times, two mountain riders, Eva Surls and Cashion Smith, wanted to open a mountain biking paradise but didn’t have the cash to make it happen. Then they met Dale Katechis, owner of Oskar Blues brewery and avid mountain rider. Now they’ve joined forces and they’re ready to help you shred western NC like a champ.
I had quite a shock when I visited the Oskar Blues web site. There I saw a picture of a blue can that looks like this:
Where had I seen that before? Those blue cans looked very familiar. I couldn’t remember where I’d seen them, so I forgot about it and decided to go for a ride. I headed into the kitchen to grab my mountain bike shoes from the fridge, and what did I see but the very same blue cans right there in my very own house.
What the hell? You’re telling me I’ve been drinking this “beer” stuff all along? I thought it was champagne! My manservent is so fired. Standish! Get in here and fire yourself!
Note: Oskar Blues did not provide beer for this article. I’m overtly sucking up to them in hopes that they will ask me to come to their mountain bike park. In fact, let’s bring the whole editorial team and our significant others. Part-ay!
Should that happen, Oskar Blues, I’m going to need you to stock a cabin with a fridge packed solid with Old Chub. Mmm Scottish Ale. So delicious. I mean, not that I would know, you know. I drink champagne, you knaves. Pinkies out!
Standish! Get in here and hire yourself again. I require my pre-ride champagne.