Wash. Literally everything Ive ever heard or read says to wash. Not washing can hurt. Sounds like youre doing everything right. Just no high pressure water on the fork seals or shock seals. As far as bearings go, Id think it would depend on the kind and if washing could damage them, they sound pretty crappy to begin with. Its a replaceable part anyways. Wont last forever. Ive been wrong before though. If I am, someone correct me. The Global Mtn Bike Network on youtube suggests doing exactly what youre doing to prolong the bike. Judging by how they ride, Id say the guy you talked to doesnt know what hes talking about.